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I'm currently a high school junior (I'll be a senior in a few months) and I've noticed and over heard my "friends" talking crap about me behind my back. They try to act like they are my friends but I can tell! I even had people come and tell me that they heard someone (my "friends") talking about me behind my back. I don't know what to do. Should I cut them off now or later? I don't want their horrible attitudes in my life. D:
What are some of your experiences with fake friends or frenemies?
I feel like I'm an expert in that department of "fake friends". Some people during those years are fortunate to have friends they can rely on, some people have friends that talk about them behind their back and have all sorts of drama but refuse to do anything about it and just pretend that nothing is wrong, and some people (like myself) have dealt with that and did something about it. In my senior year of high school, I lost all of the girls that I considered to be close friends. I even lost the two girls who I thought were my best of friends but they wanted too badly to be accepted by the other group who disliked me, and clearly, had made their choice. During my entire senior year of high school, the only thing they all seemed capable of was talking shit about me to everyone. They took all the personal things that they knew about me, all my secrets, and spilled it. I remember even when formspring was big during that year, we all had one, and I would constantly be asked/told inappropriate things, I've been told I was a slut for sleeping with so-and-so, been told that I looked fat at prom, that I wasn't good enough for my boyfriend, that all his exes were much prettier than I... Y'know, the list goes on. I had even found out much later that the majority of those inappropriate remarks were in fact made by those girls who I once called my "good friends".
What did I do about this? Nothing. I tried nicely confronting them when this drama first happened, because I had no idea what I had done to deserve losing my friends. They gave me their reasons (which was all because they didn't like the boy I was dating) but I thought to myself, if they were my true friends, whether they approved of my boyfriend or not, they would not be doing this to me right now. That relationship had only lasted a month anyway, and yet they were still willing to talk shit about me and just be nasty girls. At that point, all it looked like to me was that they wanted an excuse to behave that way. So I let them. I let them be immature, I let the other kids at school observe their immaturity. I just lived my life with my remaining year at high school pretty much treating those girls as if they didn't exist. And you know what? I felt wonderful, even with all this talk about me. I remember when it had first happened, I was devastated and thought that this would be impossible to live through. I was so scared of being alone, not having a single friend at school. But once I got myself together, the first day of this "drama", I walked into my first period religion art class and sat beside a different group of fellow classmates and asked them if they would mind if I joined them. They were perfectly fine with it and there I found the people who I would spend my remaining year of high school with. It wasn't really the kind of friendship where we hung out a lot outside of school, but for me I was perfectly content seeing them at school and being silly, you would have thought we were all the best of friends for years just looking at us. And I also met the love of my life during that year in high school who supported me through all of that crap. I just felt like all this positivity that I kept thinking in my head made positive things really happen for me. Those nasty girls seemed really thrown off by how much I was enjoying life without them, they seemed as if they were truly jealous.. Two years later I even had them message me through Facebook to apologize for all of their actions during that period of time. I just kind of said, "I'm over it, I forgive you" and continued to move on with my life, as they did with theirs.
If I were you, I wouldn't be afraid to confront them, see what the heck is up to begin with, and if you continue to have that feeling about them and their bad attitudes, then by all means cut them off. True friends don't do those things, that's the bottom line. Its better to save yourself the drama and enjoy the rest of your high school life while you can! And besides, what's the use in holding onto friends if you can't even trust them?
That's horrible but inspirational too! ^_^ I... (despite observations) don't like confrontations. :[ I think it will be much harder for me since i go to a small school where people only want to hear one side of the story and go by that.
I say be around people who make you feel good about yourself and bring you up. If it's not them, just start making other friends who are like that. I saw that you are going into your senior year, so this could be an opportunity to branch out, grow personally, and meet new people; whereas the people that aren't so nice are still doing the same thing.
I'd say to just keep your distance, more bad will come if you confront them IMO. I consider my classmates just acquaintances and there's a few that showed their loyalty throughout the years after high school.
If you really need people to talk to, frequently visit forums. C:
I would just start distancing yourself from them, no confrontation needed. Trust me, in the long run you will realize having few (or no) friends is more beneficial than having friends that make you feel terrible and bring constant negativity to your life. Be around people who make you feel good and actually bring something positive to your life.
I refuse to let people spin me around in their web of fakeness. As soon as I witness something that I know I don't want in a friend, I simply cut them off. I don't avoid them or ignore them but I don't put any effort into conversing or getting close to them. I cannot tell you how many things I hear people say about their 'friends' and then are kissing their ass and hanging out a couple of hours later.
It took me a very long time to realize that even if you don't have a single friend, you will be happier that you are no longer dragging around a group of negativity. After I dropped literally all my friends, I slowly started connecting with people who actually benefit my well-being. I deal with enough bullshit on a daily basis and I don't need any more from my "friends."
My friends from high progressively started leaving me out and hanging out with each other all the time, I realized I had been the best friend I could to all of them so I started hanging out with another group of friends, they later on apologized, but I didn't care, I wish them the best to this day, they all changed, some for the best others for the worst. The one I was closest to ended up losing her virginity to her bf of a week, he then turned her to drugs, she's so different now. I'm thankful they turned their backs on me.
Speed up a few years into college, I though I had found a true, good group of friends, wasn't the case. I learned that people will only use you for what you can offer, then ditch you and talk about you.
I've always been fine on my own. I'm my own best friend
Cut them off now, find out where you really fit in, and save yourself the hurt
This is the deep and dying breath of, this love that we've been working on.
They try to act like they are my friends but I can tell! 
I even had people come and tell me that they heard someone (my "friends") talking about me behind my back. I don't know what to do. Should I cut them off now or later? I don't want their horrible attitudes in my life. D:
