Clingy Boyfriends

Post by **logicalnonsense** » Tue Jan 05, 2016 5:49 pm

I thought this would be a fun little topic and it is pretty relative to my life right now. I have a clingy boyfriend and I have no idea how to deal with it. Honestly, this is the second time we've been together, we were together for like a month last year but I was dealing with some life stuff so I broke it off. We very recently got back together and I kind of regret it but feel like I'm stuck in this relationship now. Anyways, he is very clingy. Whenever we hang out he is literally all over me, very touchy and it makes me very uncomfortable because I'm not a very affectionate person. He also has put me on a very high pedestal. Constantly telling me how awesome I am, how I'm the best girlfriend ever, he loves me so much and never wants to lose me. We've literally only been back together for a couple of weeks. Him telling me he loves me is very overwhelming and I definitely know I don't love him back and am unsure if I ever will because of how clingy he is. He's also very immature. I have found myself detaching from him quite a bit in the past few days. Anyone else ever been in this type of situation where they have had a clingy S/O? What did you do?

Post by **Kamakazi** » Wed Jan 06, 2016 10:03 am

I was in a similar situation about 5 years ago. The guy I was dating was overly touchy, he never stopped texting/calling me. But mine took a turn for the worse.....
Eventually, his behavior got worse the longer we dated and turned very controlling. I am not the type of person to let someone else tell me what I can and cannot do - which made the situation worse. Once he realized he wasn't able to control my actions be began being very emotionally/mentally abusive. He made me feel like I was unlovable and that I was "lucky" to have him in my life... this lead to him becoming physically abusive when I didn't do what he wanted and sexually abusive.
I put up with his behavior for about 2 years... When he moved away to college, I got up the courage to break it off because I felt safe with him being 200 miles away.

Now obviously, this isn't to say all clingie boyfriends turn out to be abusive... but after that situation, if the guy I'm dating won't give me the space I need to feel safe and comfortable in our relationship, he's gone.
However, I have no been dating my current boyfriend for 3 and a half years and it couldn't be better.

My advice to you is if you don't feel comfortable and safe in dating this guy - don't. You've only been together a few weeks, maybe tell him you need more breathing room and if that doesn't work just walk away. There is no reason to be with someone you're not comfortable with.

Hopefully that helped and made sense... Good Luck!

Post by **smars27** » Wed Jan 06, 2016 1:08 pm

logicalnonsense wrote:I thought this would be a fun little topic and it is pretty relative to my life right now. I have a clingy boyfriend and I have no idea how to deal with it. Honestly, this is the second time we've been together, we were together for like a month last year but I was dealing with some life stuff so I broke it off. We very recently got back together and I kind of regret it but feel like I'm stuck in this relationship now. Anyways, he is very clingy. Whenever we hang out he is literally all over me, very touchy and it makes me very uncomfortable because I'm not a very affectionate person. He also has put me on a very high pedestal. Constantly telling me how awesome I am, how I'm the best girlfriend ever, he loves me so much and never wants to lose me. We've literally only been back together for a couple of weeks. Him telling me he loves me is very overwhelming and I definitely know I don't love him back and am unsure if I ever will because of how clingy he is. He's also very immature. I have found myself detaching from him quite a bit in the past few days. Anyone else ever been in this type of situation where they have had a clingy S/O? What did you do?

Sounds like a stage 5 clinger to me. If you talked to him about this and he isn’t respecting your wishes then he doesn’t have any consideration for your feelings so I would dump his a*ss. Sounds like he’s more in love with a “cutesy relationship” than you. Don’t worry, I’m sure he will find someone else to roleplay with, if you dump him. I don't think you guys sound compatible. I

Post by **rosiebby** » Wed Jan 06, 2016 2:07 pm

Girlllllll get out of it, you sound so unhappy and he's making you feel uncomfortable too?! Your boyfriend should be one of the people you can totally relax with.

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Post by **logicalnonsense** » Wed Jan 06, 2016 5:58 pm

smars27 wrote:
logicalnonsense wrote:I thought this would be a fun little topic and it is pretty relative to my life right now. I have a clingy boyfriend and I have no idea how to deal with it. Honestly, this is the second time we've been together, we were together for like a month last year but I was dealing with some life stuff so I broke it off. We very recently got back together and I kind of regret it but feel like I'm stuck in this relationship now. Anyways, he is very clingy. Whenever we hang out he is literally all over me, very touchy and it makes me very uncomfortable because I'm not a very affectionate person. He also has put me on a very high pedestal. Constantly telling me how awesome I am, how I'm the best girlfriend ever, he loves me so much and never wants to lose me. We've literally only been back together for a couple of weeks. Him telling me he loves me is very overwhelming and I definitely know I don't love him back and am unsure if I ever will because of how clingy he is. He's also very immature. I have found myself detaching from him quite a bit in the past few days. Anyone else ever been in this type of situation where they have had a clingy S/O? What did you do?
Sounds like a stage 5 clinger to me. If you talked to him about this and he isn’t respecting your wishes then he doesn’t have any consideration for your feelings so I would dump his a*ss. Sounds like he’s more in love with a “cutesy relationship” than you. Don’t worry, I’m sure he will find someone else to roleplay with, if you dump him. I don't think you guys sound compatible. I

Definitely a stage 5 clinger! My sister took my phone and was reading my messages earlier to see what was going down and he had texted me 5 times after the last time I texted him telling him he was overwhelming me. She was like "you texted him telling him to give you breathing space and that it makes you uncomfortable when he tells you he loves you and yet he continues to text more messages saying how much you mean and that he loves you..time to break it off" I definitely think she's right and I don't want it to end up like how one of the above posters mentioned about their relationship turning abusive. I know how that goes as I have been in an emotionally abusive relationship before and definitely don't want to go through that again. I should have noticed the signs earlier but I just really wanted this relationship to be something good

Post by **smars27** » Wed Jan 06, 2016 6:13 pm

logicalnonsense wrote:
smars27 wrote:
logicalnonsense wrote:I thought this would be a fun little topic and it is pretty relative to my life right now. I have a clingy boyfriend and I have no idea how to deal with it. Honestly, this is the second time we've been together, we were together for like a month last year but I was dealing with some life stuff so I broke it off. We very recently got back together and I kind of regret it but feel like I'm stuck in this relationship now. Anyways, he is very clingy. Whenever we hang out he is literally all over me, very touchy and it makes me very uncomfortable because I'm not a very affectionate person. He also has put me on a very high pedestal. Constantly telling me how awesome I am, how I'm the best girlfriend ever, he loves me so much and never wants to lose me. We've literally only been back together for a couple of weeks. Him telling me he loves me is very overwhelming and I definitely know I don't love him back and am unsure if I ever will because of how clingy he is. He's also very immature. I have found myself detaching from him quite a bit in the past few days. Anyone else ever been in this type of situation where they have had a clingy S/O? What did you do?
Sounds like a stage 5 clinger to me. If you talked to him about this and he isn’t respecting your wishes then he doesn’t have any consideration for your feelings so I would dump his a*ss. Sounds like he’s more in love with a “cutesy relationship” than you. Don’t worry, I’m sure he will find someone else to roleplay with, if you dump him. I don't think you guys sound compatible. I
Definitely a stage 5 clinger! My sister took my phone and was reading my messages earlier to see what was going down and he had texted me 5 times after the last time I texted him telling him he was overwhelming me. She was like "you texted him telling him to give you breathing space and that it makes you uncomfortable when he tells you he loves you and yet he continues to text more messages saying how much you mean and that he loves you..time to break it off" I definitely think she's right and I don't want it to end up like how one of the above posters mentioned about their relationship turning abusive. I know how that goes as I have been in an emotionally abusive relationship before and definitely don't want to go through that again. I should have noticed the signs earlier but I just really wanted this relationship to be something good

Eh I've had that to when I was younger when I wanted to be a relationship and have it be wonderful (now I just stick to trashy romance novels cuz real guys will never meet my expectations) but now I realize that I'd rather be alone than with the wrong guy and miserable. Good luck to you guurrrl, hope he isn't the crazy type to already think he's in love with you, cuz then you're screwed. If he is, you need to give warnings to everyone and change your phone # stat!

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