Zo(haula) - 280390 Hours of Faking Part 34

[123go]

Zoe's mouth looks like those plastic lips you get in cheap christmas crackers.

OMG YES

[jbsayshi]

At 2:00 in zoe's latest blog Alfie makes a point of showing us the cupcakes zoe made yesterday, i assume for a blog post. It's so obvious it was forced and we all know exactly why they are doing all these things.

Also the baking haul and the large amount of baking blog posts is definitely looking like a baking book. I'm just surprised they haven't done it sooner as it's too late for xmas this year and I doubt she'll be very relevant by next year. Maybe they'll release it for summer.

[Sidneycue]

This video is quite old but I dont think anyone posted it here, Charles Gross drags youtubers who hide their money and specifically says "Alfie and Zoe" near the end.

[youtube][/youtube]

Also sorry for trying to send that girl to the rave section! I reread it when I wasn't on pain killers sorry!

[Lime]

Isn't she done with the whole "peahead" thing yet?

I always find it so weird when she goes on about that because I've seen her IRL and her head is just... proportional. Not spectacularly tiny, not spectacularly big. Just normal and in proportion to her frame. I wish she'd stop the "Aren't I a delicate, fragile, tiny little princess" act. It's embarrassing. 13 year old girls do that, not women approaching 30.

The thing is, even if she is the teeny tiny dainty little pixie she claims to be, who cares? The world is chock-full of people with different bone structures, pizza princess isn't the only person who has a petite frame. (If Zoe hung out with Amelia Liana or Katie Snooks, I bet we magically would stop hearing about how darn small she is.) She picks the weirdest things to emphasize.

[PotterLegend]

Did anyone see in Alfie's vlog when he came in with a parcel and there was a slug on it and Zoe said, 'I wonder if it's called Zoe Slug?' so passive aggressively.

[omgwtfbbq]

every time she talks in a baby voice to alfie i vomit ever so slightly in my mouth

[coffeandcream]

At 2:00 in zoe's latest blog Alfie makes a point of showing us the cupcakes zoe made yesterday, i assume for a blog post. It's so obvious it was forced and we all know exactly why they are doing all these things

Haha that was exactly what I thought when I saw it! It was so blatant.

[xIts_JJx]

The bitchy digs at us are unreal.

Grow up Zalfie and act your damn ages

[umadbro]

LOL
I knew she looked like someone, I just couldn't figure out who until now

[kofi]

LOL
I knew she looked like someone, I just couldn't figure out who until now

LOL LOL LOL LOL! Spot the 7 differencess... if you can!

[Lime]

I am really looking forward to see how she'll handle Vlogmas. Main channel videos are pre-filmed, we get that much, yet for a person who struggles to film, edit and upload one single video in 168 hours, daily vlogging alone is a challenge. I hope she pulls through but I have a hunch that excuses will start to pile soon. She is probably just rolling with whatever Gleam tells her to do with her main channel and blog, even though vlogs tend to me more organic; she obviously has no passion left for what she does anymore. The whole "dead eyes, forced smiles" thing is depressing.

[kofi]

I reckon we will have the longest videos ever, barely edited and boring AF. That or Carrie will do all the nasty work for her, ha!

[sophie2592]

Did anyone see in Alfie's vlog when he came in with a parcel and there was a slug on it and Zoe said, 'I wonder if it's called Zoe Slug?' so passive aggressively.

She really wound me up in this vlog! When they're playing guitar hero at the beginning she just wants to give up straight away because she's not very good at it, she's whinging and acting like a child. I'm surprised she let Alfie keep that in, it makes her look awful.

I dislike Alfie just as much as anyone, but I do feel sorry for him sometimes to have to put up with her. She's so fucking boring, whenever he suggests anything, she always says no, unless its about ordering some sort of food she can shove in her gob. What the hell happened to her?

[Paperpinkhearts]

I think this was missed from earlier as I'm a newbie!



I knew Zoe from school and she was a nasty girl, and totally not like how the media and everyones painted her to be like.

Also I have a big piece of information which I'm sure she never told anyone, awhile back someone broke into their house and they were robbed. Loads of jewerelly, their phones cameras pretty much anything. Friends who are still friends with her told me since then they've been pretty much clinging onto their dog since this happened and won't let her outside on her own.
And Zoe is scared to leave the house incase it happens again.

Widwildlife (great username -make me think of a Bon Jovi song that's on ipod)

- What was she like at school? How was she nasty? Are you able to share a tale or two?

- Was this at her new place or her old flat?

- How do you know this?

- But she been alone in the house, wouldn't she be scared or wouldn't want to be alone?

My old place was broken into and it seriously the scariest thing ever.... It really does affect your mental health. Not long after it happen we moved.

To answer your questions.

- I answered that question. But one story was she once teased one girl because she came into school on muffty day (non uniform day for our overseas friends here!) in uniform so much she started crying and hid in the loos.
Oh and at one point she was a massive wannabe emo.

- New place

- A close friend who is also her friend. Well I say friend- Zoe has started to push people away in the past two years. She avoids the south west and never sees her old friends. My friend included but she visits her sometimes. (The friend visits-- not Zoe). To put it bluntly the reason she never really visits people is because a lot of her friends don't like Alfie. He made her a worst person.

- I don't know.

Best gossip I've heard all year. Thank you.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[xIts_JJx]

I dislike Alfie just as much as anyone, but I do feel sorry for him sometimes to have to put up with her. She's so fucking boring, whenever he suggests anything, she always says no, unless its about ordering some sort of food she can shove in her gob. What the hell happened to her?

See now this is why I DON'T feel sorry for either one of them. Both of them are CHOOSING to put up with each other. If they're so unhappy they can easily put an end to their relationship, so neither one of them deserve my sympathy in that respect

[RebeccaDoppelmeyer]

she must be writing her blog herself:
"Urban Decay are always a brand I get most excited for when there is news of a palette release. "
"I knew instantly that this palette was going straight into my everyday makeup bag and although the pink and blue shades probably won’t get used as much, when I swatched the blue I was pleasantly surprised by it’s appearance."
"Having not owned a suede skirt since i was around seven years old, it did feel a little out of my comfort zone but it swiftly became a wardrobe staple and I feel like it’s perfect for this time of year with tights and boots. "

[rachz]

she must be writing her blog herself:
"Urban Decay are always a brand I get most excited for when there is news of a palette release. "
"I knew instantly that this palette was going straight into my everyday makeup bag and although the pink and blue shades probably won’t get used as much, when I swatched the blue I was pleasantly surprised by it’s appearance."
"Having not owned a suede skirt since i was around seven years old, it did feel a little out of my comfort zone but it swiftly became a wardrobe staple and I feel like it’s perfect for this time of year with tights and boots. "

I feel like giving her blogposts to highschool kids so they can practice their proof reading and spelling

[sh0werofcunts]

imo I don't think it's possible yet to say whether Zoe will still be famous in a few years. Actors and reality stars who are already famous have clicked on to the yt cash cow and they will either take the limelight from the Brit crew or will collab with them and make them even bigger depending on how desperate they are for subs and views.

[SecretGossiper]

I just watched one of Alfie's vlog the full way through for the first time and it really struck how much crap they have lying around their house. There's just stuff everywhere! There's what looks like a printer just sitting on the floor and piles of stuff all over the living room. I am by no means an overly tidy, minimalistic person and I do believe homes should be homely but their house is kinda ridiculous. You'd think in a house that big there would plenty of storage space.

[BabyGirlGellerGreen]

OT... But if i could ask a favour for anyone that reads this to say a prayer and strong positive thoughts, for my little cousin in hospital. Please.